Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better
by King in Yellow
Summary: Kim and Shego won't let the other beat her at anything within reason, and sometimes even outside the constraints of reason. Fortunately for the sake of innocent bystanders the kitchen appears to be the only arena in which they refuse to compete. Not BEU.
1. Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better

Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the Kim Possible series are owned by Disney. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

**Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better**

"Give it up, Shego," Kim grunted as she kicked at her green foe.

"No way, Pumpkin," Shego retorted, moving to avoid the kick and striking back at Kim, "Anything you can do, I can do better."

Kim parried the pale woman's fist and aimed a punch of her own. "In your dreams. I always win."

"Don't make me laugh," Shego shot back, flipping out of Kim's range then launching a drop kick. "You're the one who ends up in the death traps."

Kim leapt into the air, rendering the older woman's attack futile, "And I'm still alive while you're the one who always ends up in jail."

"And yet here I am, fighting you," her foe pointed out. "They might as well just give me a key or put in a revolving door. I'm better than you."

"No you're not."

"Yes I am. I repeat," Shego reminded Kim, "Anything you can do, I can do better. I can do anything better than you."

During Shego's rant Kim managed to flip her, "No, you can't." the cheerleader taunted.

Shego rolled and came back, tripping Kim, "Yes, I can."

"No, you can't," Kim answered. Kim's own blow was ineffective.

"Yes, I can," Shego answered as Kim sidestepped the green woman's kick.

"No, you can't."

"Yes, I can!"

The two woman stood a few feet apart, each trying to hide the fact she was panting slightly from the exertion. "Speed, endurance, strength, swimming, you name it, I'm better," Kim insisted.

"You need to schedule a trip to a psychiatrist," Shego told her in a soothing tone. "You've lost all touch with reality."

"If there's anyone crazy here it's you."

"Ha! Tell you what Pumpkin, name a competition, and next Saturday I'll prove I'm better."

"Next Saturday you'll be in jail."

"You're yellow."

"Me? Afraid of you? No way!"

"Name it then. Oh, and no calling the cops and setting a trap – that would just prove you were too much of a coward to face me."

"I'm not afraid of you. I told you, you'll be in jail."

"Reality check," Shego called, with a sweep of her leg she knocked Kim off her feet, then sprinted to the hovercar. "Well?" Shego called before exiting through the hole in the roof.

"I'll be at the Middleton Athletic Center at one," Kim told her, then fired her grappling hook around a beam and swung up towards the hovercar. "You'll be in jail."

Shego's hand blazed green, melting the cable and Kim plunged four meters to the floor, "That's gonna leave a bruise," the older woman predicted as she escaped.

* * *

On the next Saturday Ron waited nervously with Kim at the Middleton Athletic Center, "You don't really think she'll come, do you?"

"I'm not sure," Kim admitted. "If she doesn't show up I'll accuse her of being afraid to face me. I'm pretty sure she knows that."

"She'll set up a trap of some kind," he predicted.

Rufus popped his head out of Ron's pocket and nodded agreement, "Uh-huh."

At precisely one Shego put in her appearance. She looked at Ron, sizing up his potential as an opponent and then shrugged, "Brought a witness for your humiliation?" she asked Kim.

"I brought a witness for yours. So, how are we going to do this?"

"I'll let you pick an event, then, after I beat you in that, I'll pick a second event to whip you in. Your choice Princess – where do you want me to beat you first?"

"Balance beam," Kim answered promptly. "Try not to hurt yourself."

"I'll try not to hurt your feelings… try not to hurt them too bad anyway… Hey, how do we score that? I'm not going to let doofus sidekick here say you won."

"I hadn't thought of… I didn't really think you'd show up—"

"No way I'd pass up a chance to show you up."

"Hey, I see the gymnastics coach here with his daughter. We'll ask him."

"Bring it on Pumpkin, I'm ready for you."

"We'll see about that."

Twenty-three minutes later Coach Bronski announced, "Kim had the better performance."

"See," Kim told her smugly. "Told you."

"A coach at your high school? I'm supposed to believe he was fair?"

Ron spoke up, "KP's routine was harder, and she stuck the—"

"If I want your opinion," Shego snarled, "I'll beat it out of you." She turned to Kim, "Get you ass over to the bench press. I'll whip you so bad you'll have to admit you lost."

"Well, if you beat me," Kim said, "I won't whine like you did when you got beat."

"I don't whine and I didn't get beat! Bench press, now!"

"So, how are we going to do this?" Kim asked when they moved to the weight room. "Is it, like, how many reps at a hundred pounds or something?"

"A hundred pounds?" Shego scoffed. "That all you can do?"

"I don't want to show you up too badly," Kim answered. "What do you want, one-twenty? One-fifty?"

Shego yawned, "This isn't even a competition. Three hundred."

"You're kidding."

"I don't kid, I win." The green woman pulled out the pin at the seventy pound plate and moved it to the bottom of the stack. "You first," she invited.

"You go first," Kim insisted. _"No way can she do that."_

Shego lay down on the bench and took a couple deep breaths, concentrated, and quickly did a half dozen reps. She stood and nodded to Kim, "Your turn Princess."

Kim lay down on the bench_. "If she can do it, I can do it,"_ she told herself. She took a couple deep breaths, concentrated, and strained with all her might. She couldn't manage a full lift.

"See, I'm better," Shego boasted.

"I did better in agility, and that's more important than brute strength," Kim argued.

"And that's sour grapes, Loser," Shego taunted.

"You pick a competition then."

"I have things to do, I—"

"Two weeks from today. Go to my website. No, 'I'm a better thief' competition. That's like me saying an honesty competition – which I'd win, and that's better than being a crook."

"I'll consider it… I'm out of here. I have a life."

"Working for Drakken is a life?" Ron called as the green woman headed for the door of the athletic center. The green woman gritted her teeth. Working for Drakken was not a life, it was a job, but she was not about to admit that to the pair.

On Sunday morning Drakken knocked on the door to Shego's quarters in the lair. "Breakfast," he called in a cheery voice. "I made blueberry pancakes."

"Not hungry," Shego groaned from her room.

"But you love—"

"Not hungry! Go away!"

"I need you to steal a guidance system for—"

"Go away! I'm using sick leave."

"But I—"

"Don't make me hurt you! Go away!"

The final 'Go away' had not been necessary. The threat of 'Don't make me hurt you,' had been enough to get the blue man moving away from her quarters. It was fortunate the threat alone had been enough to drive him off, at the moment she couldn't hurt a fly. Shego lay in bed, in pain and unable to move her arms_. "Maybe tomorrow I'll be able to lift my arms enough to feed myself or brush my teeth,"_ she told herself. She debated whether beating Kim in the competition justified the pain she was now suffering and concluded, "Yes, yes it does."

* * *

On Thursday Kim took a call from Wade on the Kimmunicator, "Weird hit on the website."

"What do you mean?"

"It sounds a little like Shego, and sounds like a challenge."

"It is. She claimed she was better than me. We had a preliminary competition last Saturday… Didn't I tell you?"

"No."

"The way you know everything I probably just figured you knew. What did she say?"

"Tell Pumpkin the Lowerton track at two-thirty. She needs to bring her running shoes – if she's not yellow."

"Lowerton track? Does she mean the track at the high school?"

"I don't know – she's not from around here. I'd guess she means the Lowerton Speedway, there are no events this weekend and it's the longest track in Lowerton."

"Or maybe she'll say I showed up at the wrong place and say I was afraid to face her. Can you send a reply asking for details?"

"I can try."

Two weeks after the initial competition Ron and Kim cruised around the parking lot at the Lowerton Speedway. They noticed green and black ribbons tied on one gate and investigated. The padlock was gone and the two went in. Shego was in the press box with a pair of binoculars. The two appeared to be alone so she went down to meet them.

"Two races," the green woman proposed. "A hundred yard sprint and two miles."

"Two miles," Kim scoffed, "Is that all you can do?"

"It's not all I can do," Shego snarled. "I don't have all day to waste proving I'm better than you."

Ron spoke up, "I still don't understand why you're trying to show you're as good as—"

"Better!" Shego shouted. "I'm better than the cheerleader. I'm going to rub her nose in it."

Ron continued to irritate Shego with, "So why are you afraid to run as far as—"

"I'm not afraid of anything!" Shego turned to Kim. "How far do you want?"

"I didn't really have a distance, I was just asking… Five times around the track? That's… um… a little less than four miles."

"You're on, Princess." She turned to Ron, "Sidekick, can you watch the finish line without cheating too much?"

"Ron is always fair," Kim insisted.

"Too dumb to cheat huh?"

Ron spoke up in his own defense, "Hey, I know how to cheat."

Kim closed her eyes and a pained expression went across her face as Shego laughed. "Fair play, Ron, fair play."

"When you see my back as I cross the finish line you'll know I won anyway," Shego predicted.

Shego had neglected to bring a tape measure for an exact distance, "Thought you'd be afraid to show up," she explained.

The two women stood side to side and Ron paced off what he guessed was a hundred yards, "This look right?" he called.

"Close enough." "Okay."

"Do I get a flag to wave or something?"

"Just tell us when to start," Kim suggested.

"And let Princess know that I won," Shego added.

"On your mark," Ron called. "Get set… Go…"

Ten second later Shego boasted, "See, I'm better than you."

Kim wasn't certain if Shego had made a fair start or jumped the call to go, but she wasn't going to complain. "You may have more experience in running away. Let's see how you do on distance."

Shego took off at a sprinter's pace at the start of the five lap race, and almost lapped Kim on her first time around the track. Kim set a steady pace and narrowed the distance slightly on the second lap as Shego proved unable to maintain the fast pace. On the third lap Shego was starting to sweat while Kim was running comfortably and conserving her strength. On the fourth lap Shego could hear Kim's steps as the redhead almost caught up. The green woman tried to increase her pace, but had put too much energy into her initial sprint. Half way through the fifth lap Kim went into the lead. Shego gave it everything she had and briefly almost caught up with Kim. The green woman's reserves exhausted she was around twenty meters behind Kim when the redhead finished. Kim looked like she could have continued running.

"I started faster," Shego panted.

"And you finished second," Ron pointed out. "KP beat you fair and square. She's got endurance."

"I don't need endurance, I can always beat her so fast I don't need endurance."

"When I say things like that," Ron told her, "my mom says I'm just making excuses."

"Can you put a muzzle on your lap dog?" Shego suggested to Kim. "He's starting to get annoying."

"Truth hurts, huh?" Kim asked.

"Upperton triathalon in a couple months," Ron suggested.

"Ron!" Kim protested.

"I don't need to wait months to show I'm better than Pumpkin here," Shego warned. "Pick another competition. Anything… Nothing domestic… I don't make cakes and I don't jump out of them."

"That's okay," Ron told her. "Kim is a terrible cook. One time she—"

"Ron!" Kim protested again.

"And she told me about one time when she tried to iron a blouse. It had this—"

"Shego said no domestic stuff," Kim said, punctuating the comment with a gentle shove on his shoulder. "It's enough to respect she doesn't want to demonstrate her weakness in the area."

Shego was chuckling through the exchange. "I might beat you… But I said your choice, What'll it be?"

"Swimming," Kim told her. "Middleton has a new San Francisco Fitness. Two weeks from today, two in the afternoon."

Shego shrugged, "Going to give me the events? We could do more than two." _"She doesn't know I was on the Central High swim team."_

"Low and high dive?" Kim suggested. "Full-size pool… One lap and eight hundred meters?" _"She doesn't know I'm on the Middleton High swim team."_ "Of course, if you're in jail I'll understand if you don't show up."

"I'll be there, count on it." _"Going to get in shape for that triathalon. She only beat me today because I didn't pace myself."_

The swimming competition was another split decision.

Kim missed the next competition because of a rescue mission.

Shego won the tennis match the next week, losing the first, close set, and winning the second set by a wide margin before the third set which went on for almost two hours with the advantage going back and forth before Shego finally managed to put it away.

Monique had been recruited as a line judge for the tennis match and volunteered to put together a quiz to see if both Kim and Shego could prove they were smarter than a fifth grader. The green woman protested her belief that Monique could not be trusted – convinced she would tell Kim the answers in advance.

"She won't tell me any answers," Kim insisted. "You may need to cheat to win, but I play fair."

"I don't need to cheat to beat you," Shego sneered. "But have you ever noticed that the biggest crooks in the world insist they're honest? At least I have the honesty to tell you I'm evil."

The two women tied in total right answers. Kim did slightly better in three categories: English, math, and science, but Shego did much better in history.

"I guess there are advantages in being old," Kim mused when Monique gave them the scores. "More history happened in your life."

Ron and Monique separated Kim and Shego in the ensuing fight.

No victors could be declared in the skiing competition. Kim and Shego were so close that neither would admit the other could have won. Neither Ron nor Monique were able to serve as an arbiter. Monique twisted her ankle on her first run on the bunny slope and Ron had helped her to the lodge and stayed to make sure she kept the ankle elevated and didn't run out of hot chocolate.

It was getting dark before Kim and Shego came into the lodge, arguing.

"Did you go down all the slopes?" Ron asked.

"All the big ones," Kim answered.

"Twice," Shego explained. I beat her both times on the forest slope."

"And I beat you both times on the ridge slope."

"You were just lucky."

"And you weren't? The only–"

"Uh, can you finish your argument later?" Ron asked. "Monique and I want to get home."

As he helped her off the couch to walk to the parking lot Monique winced, "You are not going right home," she warned Ron, putting an arm over his shoulder for support. "I need a little more TLC for the ankle. You're gonna stop at my place for awhile. We should be back in time for Steel Toe in the Parallelogram of Peril special. You want to watch it with us, Kim?"

"Wrestling? I'll pass. I'm tired from beating Shego skiing – I'm going to turn in early."

"Get back on your meds," Shego suggested. "You're delusional."

Monique's brother and two of his buddies were also there for the wrestling match, forcing Ron and Monique very close together on the couch. After the program the other three left and Ron stood up to leave.

"Not yet," Monique told him firmly. She pointed to her ankle. "You got to make me some popcorn and bring me a glass of ice and a diet Coke before you can leave. Hey, want to watch the movie with me? Father Goose."

"Isn't it Mother Goose?"

"No, the movie is called Father Goose. Comedy set in World War II."

"Jews don't find a lot funny in World War II."

"And African-Americans do? The popcorn is in the cupboard over the microwave. Diet Coke is at the bottom of the pantry, get one for yourself. Hey, watch ten minutes with me and decide if you want to stay for the whole movie."

They sat close to share the popcorn. Partway through the movie Monique giggled and started feeding him popcorn. "Hey, what are you doing?" he demanded.

"You were taking such good care of me at the lodge today, I'm saying thanks by feeding you."

"Popcorn is how you say thanks?"

"Well, no," she admitted. She chuckled, "Usually I prefer this way." She leaned over to give him a fast kiss.

She meant it to be a fast kiss. He wasn't expecting a kiss at all. It had been meant as a joke, but it felt good to both of them and lasted longer than intended.

The kiss ended suddenly - both looked shocked. Ron stood up, backing away from Monique. "I'd, uh, better get home."

"Yeah… Yeah… I… Thanks…"

"It was… Yeah… See you Monday."


	2. In What You Wear I'd Look Better

Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the Kim Possible series are all owned by Disney. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

**In What You Wear I'd Look Better Than You**

"Okay, what's going on with the two of you," Kim demanded at lunch on Thursday. "I don't think you've spoken all week."

"Nothing wrong," Monique assured her.

"I'm fine," Ron said quickly.

"You've been acting weird," Felix told him. "I mean weirder than usual."

"Hey, you're my friend," Ron reminded him.

"I am. Aren't you supposed to tell your friends the truth?"

"Nah. Lie to your friends. If I ask do these jeans make my butt look–"

"What guy would ask that?" Felix interrupted.

"Are you saying I got a big rear?" Monique cut in.

"No, I… I'm trying to change the subject to anything else."

"Oh… Yeah," Monique chuckled nervously. "No way to answer... My mom… Kim, how did you do on the essay for Composition?"

"Now you're trying to change the subject."

"No she's not," Ron insisted. "How did you do in Composition?"

"Ron! You're not even in Comp! Did you two have some kind of fight? C'mon, kiss and make up."

Ron blushed. "Got to run," Monique said and pushed herself from the table and hurried off.

Kim decided Ron and Monique must have had a fight about something because of the way they were avoiding each other. The tension was obvious.

Felix picked up another kind of tension. Kim could be oblivious at times and it appeared to Felix that she was missing the real tension between the two. He resolved to grill Ron after school when they planned to meet for a game of HORSE.

"Double-handed, backwards, from the left edge of the three point line," Felix announced and sank the basket. "And that's R."

"It's not R until I miss it," Ron reminded him. He traded places with Felix on the court and dribbled the ball three times for luck before missing the shot. "Okay, now it's R." He tossed the basketball to Felix. "I've beaten you at HORSE before. I can do it again."

"I know," Felix agreed. "But I don't think it's gonna be today… What's going on with you and Monique?"

"I don't know what you mean. Take your shot."

"You know exactly what I mean. Kim thinks the two of you are mad at each other. That isn't the vibe I'm getting."

Ron sat down on the bleacher and Felix rolled the chair over beside him. "I don't know," Ron admitted. "We were just watching a movie at her place, kinda fooling around and—"

"Did either of you take your clothes off?"

"Felix!" Ron protested, turning red. "We were just watching a movie and talking. There was one little kiss. Nothing else. That's all. No story."

"If there was nothing else the two of you wouldn't be acting weird."

"I'm not acting weird!"

"Yes you are. I only see two reasons. One would be if you hated it, in which case I think you'd tell me. The other is you liked it, but you aren't sure how much you liked it, or if she liked it. You may be afraid of something else too… Kim is my guess, and—"

"I'm not afraid of Kim, she's my best friend."

"You could be afraid of hurting her, afraid to tell her the truth."

"I don't know the truth. Monique is my friend. We just had our lips together for a couple seconds. It didn't mean anything."

"But you aren't sure, are you? You're thinking it felt good."

"When did you get to be so smart? No fair, smart and hoop skills."

"At least you got the mad thumbs for video games. Talk with me."

Ron stared off into space for a minute. "I don't know what I'm feeling. Yeah, the kiss was nice. Was it just a spur of the moment thing, or could I have… No, you're right, I don't know what Kim would think."

"Tell her the truth."

"I told you, I don't know the truth."

"And you're making no effort to find it out. You and Monique are Kim's two best friends. Do you think she wants either of you to be unhappy?"

"Of course not."

"Tell Kim you're asking Monique out. Don't go behind her back or anything. Maybe you aren't really interested in Monique and it was just some one time thing. Maybe she's not interested. Maybe one of you is interested and the other isn't. But try and find the truth instead of hiding under a rock."

"I'm not hiding under a rock."

"Yes you are."

"No. I couldn't find one big enough."

Felix chuckled, "Okay. Hey, that's my advice. And for my next shot, mid-court – right on the center line."

"You miss those a lot."

"And you always miss them. S if I make it."

* * *

"You and Monique?" Kim asked in disbelief when Ron said he was thinking about asking Monique out.

"Yeah, I… Why not?"

"I don't…" Kim shrugged. "I mean, it's not like we're going steady. I just didn't picture the two of you as an item."

"We're not an item. It was fun watching TV with her last week when she twisted her ankle. I thought, I dunno, maybe I'd ask her out for dinner or something after the competition with Shego this weekend. Do you need us there? What's the contest?"

"Bowling. I told you Tuesday."

"You expect me to remember what you said Tuesday?"

"Sorry, forgot who I was talking to. Need me to remind you what my name is?"

"Nah. You're Carrie Practical. Everyone knows who you are. It's that blond kid you hang around with no one can remember."

Kim laughed and gave him a hug. "Hey if Monique shoots you down for Saturday I'll take you to Bueno Nacho after bowling and I'll buy. I really appreciate the way you've got my back in these competitions."

Monique hesitated when Ron asked her. "Me? You?"

"Sure. There's a new pizza place I wanted to try and…"

"Kim turned you down?"

"I didn't ask Kim."

"You didn't ask Kim to go with you?"

"I… uh… asked her if it was okay with her if I asked you."

Monique raised an eyebrow, "You asked Kim's permission to ask me out?"

"Don't say it like that. I just thought… I dunno… I felt like maybe… So, want pizza after bowling or not?"

"I…" She smiled at him. "Is this a you're buying or Dutch?"

"I haven't thought that far ahead. I thought you might say no."

"Dutch. No pressure. We're just going to talk. You can even bring Rufus along as chaperone."

"With the cheese on the pizza I don't think he'd let me leave him home."

Bowling was another split decision. Kim beat Shego in the first two games by narrow margins – two pins and six pins. The redhead was slightly ahead through most of the third game and was starting to boast when Shego struck out in the final frame and ended up beating Kim by thirteen pins.

"I won two games out of three!"

"Add up the scores for all three games. I beat you by five pins. I win."

As the two argued Monique leaned over and whispered in Ron's ear, "Time to leave?"

He nodded."You going to try the triathalon in two weeks?" Ron asked Kim and Shego before leaving.

"I'm ready," Kim told him. "She'll probably be in jail."

Kim and Shego were still arguing when Ron and Monique slipped away.

As they ate Monique told him about life before Middleton. Most of Ron's stories were adventures with Kim. They kept talking after dinner. Several hours later they were asked to leave Scarlotti's Pizza Palace for taking up space that would be better used by paying customers.

"That was fun," Ron told her, hoping there would be a goodnight kiss.

"_He's too tight with Kim. I'm not going out with him again."_

Ron asked her out again for the next weekend. Monique used the excuse she was helping Kim train not to accept.

* * *

Kim and Ron awoke in a small room, shackled to a heavy steel post set deep in the concrete floor. "Good, you're awake," Drakken sneered

"What happened?" Ron asked groggily. "I hit the self-destruct button."

"My idea," Shego chuckled. "You've gotten in a rut. I suggested Doc here tie the self-destruct button–"

"It was my idea!" Drakken insisted.

"No it wasn't," she told him firmly. "Doc and I took the antidote ahead of time. Doofus here hit the switch, like usual, only this time you three all went to la-la land."

"Where's Rufus?" Ron asked.

"Over there," Shego told him, pointing to a cage set on the floor. "Look's like he's still out."

"Come, Shego," Drakken said impatiently. "I want to turn on the water and drown them."

"Not so fast," she warned him. "Give them fifteen minutes to be afraid of drowning before you turn on the water slowly, so they'll see it rise. The whole point is to instill fear."

"But she always escapes," he insisted. "Let me turn it on now, please?"

She gave him an exasperated looked, "No! I said fifteen minutes." She looked at Kim and Ron, "Honestly, it's like dealing with a ten-year old." The green woman looked back at Drakken. "Look at your watch. Fifteen minutes. Go out now. You can wait by the valve in the control room. I'm going to double-check and make sure the chains are tight."

Drakken looked at his watch, "I pay your salary," he grumbled. "I deserve a little–"

"And now you're acting like a five-year old. Go to the control room, now." He stomped out of the room and Shego held a key up. "Will take him a minute to reach the control room. Probably five minutes to remember where he left the key to the control room and get it from the lab. I'll unlock you now, but it counts as a win for me."

"No way!" Kim protested. "I can always escape without your help."

"Maybe," Shego agreed, "but it's like investment companies. Past performance doesn't guarantee future results. You always have escaped in the past. Doesn't mean you will this time."

"Why are you even making the offer," Kim demanded.

Shego shrugged. "I figure you probably will escape, but you'll claim you pulled a muscle or use some other lame-ass excuse when you lose to me in the triathalon. I don't need an advantage to whip you. Say I won today, admit it, and I unlock your hands."

"No!" Kim told her.

"Uh, KP?" Ron interrupted. "I, uh, think under the circumstances she's being very fair. This seems like a good time to use your best manners and accept her generous offer and say thank you."

"But she'll count it as a win! I don't need her to escape!"

"It's not that hard, KP. You just say, 'Thank you, Shego. You won this time, but I'll beat you next time.' You can do it."

"Fine," Kim grumbled, "Thank you, Shego. You won–"

"She doesn't sound very sincere," Shego remarked to Ron. "Do you think I should ask for sincere?"

"She's doing the best she can," Ron assured her. "She's not used to saying you won, but she's saying it."

"I guess," Shego sighed, "You should try for sincerity next time I beat you," she told Kim. "Start over from where you say I won."

Kim gritted her teeth, "You won this time. I'm only saying that because–"

"Manners, KP," Ron reminded her.

"I don't suppose you'd let him say you won, would you?" Kim asked. Shego shook her head no. "You win," Kim sighed. "But I'm going to beat you at the triathalon."

Shego chuckled, "Let me check these chains to make sure you're fastened nice and tight," she said and, reaching up, unlocked Kim's hands. "Yep that's good, no way you'll escape that. I'd better not lose the key," she told herself and dropped it at Kim's feet.

"Do we, uh need to stop Drakken's plan?" Ron asked.

"Nah," Shego assured him. "This one is total dud, but he doesn't realize it yet. Well, since the two of you are safely locked up I'll leave you to your watery doom."

As soon as Shego left the room Kim bent down, took the key and unlocked her legs, then freed Ron who took the sleeping Rufus out his cage.

"I could have escaped," she insisted.

_"Like dealing with a ten-year old,"_ Ron thought, but wisely did not say.

The triathlon was a long course. "After I beat you in this," Shego boasted, "will you admit defeat, or will I need to beat you in a full ironman?"

"Big talk before it even starts," Kim retorted. "Let's see what you say at the end of the day. I've already beaten you in an endurance competition."

"I didn't pace myself. Today I'm ready."

The ninety-kilometer bike ride started the race. Kim stripped her gears on the first big hill and fell well behind the pack before she could get moving again. She was tempted to blame Shego for sabotaging her bicycle, but had to admit she had shifted badly.

By the time Kim reached the pool the green woman had completed two lengths of the pool and had started her third. Kim had proven herself a stronger swimmer than Shego and forgot all about pacing herself in her effort to catch up during the one-point-nine kilometer swim.

Shego had felt confident at the start of the swim with Kim nowhere to be seen, but the fact Kim was able to catch up with her during the swim panicked the older woman, who didn't realize to what degree the effort had exhausted the redhead. The sense of panic made Shego forget all about her good intentions at the start of the twenty-one point one kilometer run. The green woman took off at a pace which was too fast for the strength she had left. And Kim, refusing to recognize how much the swim had taken out of her, also forgot all about pacing herself in her effort to beat Shego.

Shego made it almost half-way through the race before moving to the side and collapsing, lying down on the ground and gasping for air.

Kim, fearing a trick on the part of the green woman, kept up the pace for almost another two kilometers before collapsing herself.

"Good effort, GF," Monique congratulated Kim when she and Ron picked her up in Kim's car.

"Yeah," Ron agreed. "You and Shego were, like, way out ahead of everyone. Before… Hey, should we offer her a ride back to town?"

Kim shrugged "I guess so. Hey, I went further."

"I was faster," Shego pointed out as she got in the car.

"No you weren't."

"I was ahead of you when I collapsed."

"I was faster swimming."

"I was faster on the bike."

"I had problems, that doesn't count!"

Ron and Monique gave sideways glances at each other and shook their heads sadly.

"Ron and I found a good pizza place," Monique offered. "We'll take you both there if you agree to shut up about the triathalon."

"For pizza? I can drop it."

"I can drop it better than you."

"No you can't."

"Yes I–"

"Could you drop dropping it?" Ron pleaded, "Please?"

The tables at Scarlotti's were covered with sheets of white butcher paper, with a few crayons in a cup at each table to let children amuse themselves by drawing. While they waited for their pizzas to arrive Kim took out a purple crayon, drew a tic-tac-toe board on the paper and drew a circle in the center. She looked at Shego and raised an eyebrow. The thief chose a green crayon and put an 'x' in one corner.

The two woman had played twelve tie games by the time the pizzas arrived, and Kim had been careless in one game which had given Shego one victory. After the waitress left Ron grabbed a slice of pepperoni. "Hey, I could eat a piece of pizza faster than–"

Monique clapped a hand over his mouth before he could finish. "No you won't. I'm not eating with three crazies."

"Ah, man!" Ron protested.

"You can enjoy it more if you chew," Kim pointed out.

"Besides," Shego began, "I could eat it–" Monique's glare cut her short. "Chewing, yeah," the thief agreed with Kim. "Appreciate the flavor." She took a bite. "Hey, this is good!"

"OW!" Kim exclaimed. "And hot! … But it is good."

* * *

"What's wrong," Kim asked Monique during a homework session in her bedroom. "You never said anything about going out with Ron a couple weeks ago. "I mean, if it had been a disaster you'd have said something, or if it had been, like, nothing, you'd have said something. So was it, like, WOW?"

"Nothing happened, I don't want to talk about it."

"Sure you don't want talk about it?"

"Yeah, I–"

"He said he's asked you about again, but you told him no."

"Well, yeah, I–"

"So were you just busy or really not interested?"

"I don't know if–"

"'Cause I can tell him to back off, if you want. Or you can give me a good time to mention to him."

Monique reached over and gently pinched Kim's lips together between a thumb and forefinger. "Will you let me finish a sentence?" Kim nodded agreement as best she could. Monique freed Kim's mouth and continued. "I like the guy," she shrugged, "but he's got this other girlfriend I happen to like and I don't want to do anything to hurt her."

"Me?"

"You."

"Good, 'cause if he was holding out on me about another girlfriend I'd be mad."

"You're weirding me out, GF. I don't want to break the two of you up."

"That's your worry?"

"Isn't it yours? You date him."

Kim was silent for a minute. "I don't think you could break the two of us up… I mean, not turn each other into strangers or anything. Ron and I have been best friends since forever. I don't see that ending. We've dated some too, but I don't think we're exclusive or anything. If he wants to ask someone out, or someone asks me out we're free to do so. You two are my best friends in the world… You wouldn't stop being my friend if you dated Ron would you?"

"No way."

"He won't stop being my friend if he dates you… He and I are kind of a package deal. If you do date him you have to know I'm his best friend."

"And you got no problem with him dating me?"

Kim hesitated a moment. "No. Your worry is you don't want me to be unhappy. I don't want either of my two best friends to be unhappy. If the two of you like each other, fine. If you date a couple times and find out you don't like it I only want you to promise you'll stay friends with each other and with me. Ron asking you out seems fairly normal… For Ron. If he asked Bonnie out I'd know there was something wrong with him."

Monique gave Kim a fast hug. "You're the greatest."

"So, going to accept him next time he asks you out?"

"I guess… I hope I haven't discouraged him too much by not accepting any invitations the last couple weeks."

"I'll pass the word on." Kim had an afterthought, "Oh, fair warning, either one of you hurts the other's feeling and I've got his or her back."

Monique laughed, "Sounds good. But this isn't helping us with Hamlet. We need to finish the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern question."

* * *

Shego had given Kim a cell number to make arranging the competitions, which were now weekly, easier.

"Karaoke?" the green woman asked in disbelief. "Why in the hell are you challenging me to karaoke?"

"Afraid you'll lose?"

"I never lose to you, Pumpkin, I can sing any note sweeter than you. But karaoke?"

"I want Ron and Monique to have some time talking together."

"And you think a karaoke bar… You've never really been in a karaoke bar, have you?"

"No."

"And how are we going to judge this?"

"I hadn't thought of–"

"You haven't thought of a lot, have you?"

"Do they applaud after someone sings?"

"Only if you don't stink too much."

"I could have Wade bring a decibel meter, winner is whoever gets the loudest applause."

"Nerdlinger? You really want to stack the deck against me. If you get boy genius I'm bringing Drakken. Hey, not Saturday, Friday is his regular karaoke night."

"Okay, Friday… Do they let minors in?"

"Parents bring kids… You're probably okay if you're with an adult or stick with soda. And tell your genius bud to keep things honest."

"Who do you think you're talking to? I'm always honest!"

"Always?"

"Usually… How honest are you? Seldom?"

"Probably not that often. Eight this Friday in Upperton. Brewster's Bar and Grill on Oak."

It was not clear if Drakken or Kim were the more surprised on Friday evening. "What are you doing here?" he sputtered. "I'm not trying to… Okay, I am trying to take over the world, but my evil shift is over."

"You are still a criminal," she reminded him, "and–"

"Evil genius, please," he requested.

"Fine. You're an evil genius. But I'm here for karaoke. Why are you dressed like that?" He was out of 'uniform', wearing a plaid flannel shirt, jeans, cowboy boots, and a Stetson.

"What a coincidence. I'm here for karaoke too. I sing country-western."

Behind Drakken, and out of his line of vision, Shego mouthed, "Don't tell him."

Drakken sang early while Kim and Shego were frantically looking through the lists of available songs, "Why don't you and Ron do a duet," Kim suggested to Monique and handed her a copy of the list.

"No way, KP," Ron protested. "I don't sing."

"It isn't stopping Drakken."

"Actually, he's not bad," Wade commented as he took a reading on the applause level as Drakken finished, 'All My Ex-es Live in Texas'.

Monique leaned over and gently bumped Ron with her shoulder, "It wouldn't hurt to look."

The karaoke jockey was taking requests at random from the slips turned in and Shego went much earlier than Kim even though they turned in their requests at the same time. Monique's turn also came before Kim and she dragged Ron up. After protesting every song she had suggested she picked one and told him they were doing it. As they went to the stage, however, she whispered, "I'm doing the guy's part, you're doing the girl's part."

"What?"

"Trust me, Ron, it'll be funny."

The pair got a loud ovation for 'Baby It's Cold Outside'.

A drunk without enough range mangled 'American Pie' before Kim was called up for 'Both Sides Now'.

_Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels, the dizzy dancing way you feel  
As every fairy tale comes true; I've looked at love that way.  
But now it's just another show. You leave 'em laughing when you go.  
And if you care, don't let them know, don't give yourself away._

_I've looked at love from both sides now,  
From give and take, and still somehow  
It's love's illusions I recall.  
I really don't know love at all._

Monique, Wade, and Ron applauded wildly as Kim returned to the table.

After other two songs Drakken was back at the microphone for 'Achy Breaky Heart', a song which should have been allowed to die an ignoble death years earlier and the volume of applause was down considerably from his first effort.

"Kim got louder applause than Shego," Wade mentioned as the teens prepared to leave for Middleton.

"No way," Shego protested.

"The numbers don't lie," Kim smirked.

"You brought an entourage to do it," Shego pouted. "I'll bet they were clapping right over the meter."

"We were at the table beside yours," Monique reminded her. "Did you see any of us doing that?" Shego reluctantly shook her head no. "But I'll give you credit, I thought you did great with 'You're So Vain'."

"I am not vain!" Kim interrupted.

It was Shego's turn to smirk. "Who said it was about you? You're so full of yourself you probably think that song was about you."

Kim to Ron, "Help me here."

"I agree with you," he assured her. "I figured it was about you."

Kim closed her eyes and a pained expression went over her face.

Shego laughed, "Thanks," she told Ron. "If you agree with Pumpkin here is means you think she's vain."

* * *

Wade called Kim and Ron with news that Drakken and Shego were attempting a theft from a high-tech lab. The teens arrived while the villains were sorting through the lab for what Drakken needed. "Get Drakken," Kim barked at Ron, "I've got Shego."

"In your dreams, Princess," Shego answered and tried a roundhouse kick.

"Why now?" Drakken whined, "I just found…" He started running for the hovercraft carrying a box. While he was much closer to the hovercraft the box was heavy and he could hear Ron catching up fast. Afraid of capture he turned, "Fragile!" he shouted and tossed the box at Ron. The teen had no idea what was in the box, but couldn't risk it breaking. He dove, catching the box before it could hit the floor, but unable to pursue the blue man who fled the building.

Ron returned to where Kim and Shego had been fighting. Shego was face down on the floor with Kim on her back, snapping cuffs on the green woman. "He got away, Kim," Ron apologized, "But he didn't get what he came for."

"Why are you even bothering with cuffs?" Shego demanded. "I just burn them off."

"I'd like to see you try," Kim invited, moving a few feet away for the sake of safety.

Shego's hands glowed green, the room grew hotter, and the cuffs remained in place. "What the hell?"

"Wade figured out a material immune to your plasma," Kim told her. "These cuffs will hold you. Ron, go tell security that we stopped the robbery."

"Sure thing," he agreed and left to find someone to whom he could report.

When he got back Kim was alone, Shego was gone. "She escaped," Kim explained.

Ron raised an eyebrow. "She escaped? I thought you said the cuffs would hold her."

"They did…"

"So, how did she escape… Kim, you let her escape, didn't you? And you made her say you won, didn't you?"

"Well…"

"That is so wrong. You let her go just to hear her say you won?"

"Of course not. I did not make her say I won. First, I felt like I owed her for helping us escape that one time."

He shrugged. "Okay. I guess that makes sense. You said first. Is there a second?"

"Yes. Second, the police can't keep her in handcuffs forever. And you know as soon as they release her she'd escape. I figure I probably saved the county money; they won't have to repair the jail. And, ah, third… I figure that even she didn't say I won, she knows I did."

* * *

"Warm weather competition," Shego announced when she skyped Kim. Monique and Ron were with Kim when the connection was made.

"And that is?" Kim demanded.

"Which of us looks hotter on the beach."

Kim gave her a look of distain, "That is utterly sexist."

Shego yawned, "Or you could just admit I look hotter than you and give up the lame excuses."

"Hey, KP's not afraid of you," Ron interrupted.

"Ron! I—"

"Name the beach," Ron continued. "She'll be there."

"You and Monique will have to keep score," Shego told him. "Princess and I will have to be far enough apart there's no danger of any guy who trips over his own tongue while staring at me gets counted in her total."

"Is anyone listening to me?" Kim demanded.

"Identical swimsuits," Monique said firmly. "I'm not having you beat my girl by wearing some kind of dental floss and calling it a swimsuit."

"The suits can be identical," Shego agreed, smiling. She put her hands beneath her breasts and lifted them slightly. "But on me it's going to look smaller."

Shego, in a beach robe was near the Snack Shack drinking a diet cola when Kim and company arrived.

"This is so wrong," Kim protested again.

"Then quit now and save yourself the humiliation of admitting I'm hotter than you."

"No way!"

Monique wanted to know, "Exactly how do you measure who is hotter?"

"If you and Ron can be honest," Shego answered. "I'm thinking there," she pointed to a section of beach, "and there," she pointed to another section of beach, "are where Kim and I will throw out our towels. You and Doofus can sit on these beach chairs and count how many guys stare, whistle, try to hit us up, walk by three or four times–"

"How do you count that?" Ron wanted to know. "Is walking by four times worth more than walking by three times? What about five?"

"I don't care," Shego answered. "You and Monique figure out whatever rules you want. Just be consistent."

"Go stake out your spot," Monique told Kim and Shego. "Leave the robes on for ten minutes. Ron and I need to set up and decide on the rules we're going to use."

"How long are we supposed to be out there like fresh meat?" Kim asked. "Half an hour?"

"I was thinking more like three," Shego told her.

"An hour and a half," Monique told them. "Move it. And remember; leave the robes on for ten minutes while Ron and I figure out scoring.

"You want to watch Kim or Shego," Monique asked Ron as she took off her own beach robe.

Ron stared and tried to swallow. "Can I watch you?" he asked.

Monique giggled, "You like this bikini?"

"Wow," he said softly. "Just wow. You would so win this competition if you were–"

"The crazies are out there on the beach, remember? We are not crazies; we are enablers. Kim or Shego?"

"No way I'm picking! You'll think I think whoever I say is hotter. You pick, I'll watch the other."

She draped her robe over the back of the chair facing the direction of Kim. "You watch Shego," she told Ron. She gave him a fast kiss on the lips, "And thanks for the compliment."

Ron and Monique decided there were many ways for points to be scored. Bold stares were easy to see, sneaking peeks was harder. Throwing a Frisbee so it landed nearby was obvious, as were offers to apply suntan lotion. Girlfriends moving boyfriends from the vicinity counted, as did called propositions.

"Were there any rules about what Kim and Shego could do?" Monique asked, "'cause Kim might be cheating."

"What's Kim doing? There weren't any rules or I know Shego would be."

"Kim's doing some kind of stretching exercises. What's Shego doing?"

"Stretching exercises? That's nothing. Shego's eating."

"How is eating cheating?"

"She's eating a banana, and it's how she's eating it. She's–"

"That's enough Ron. I get the picture."

"So does every guy on the beach with a cell phone. Man, I bet that's already up on YouTube. I had no idea she was such a tease."

"Well keep that thought to yourself. I'm not having our girl in a tramp contest seeing who can be trashier."

"Kim wouldn't do that."

"When those two are going head to head I've got no idea what might happen."

At the hour and a half mark Monique called, "Time!" and Kim put her robe back on. "Let's go give her the bad news," Monique said to Ron.

"I, uh, why don't you go tell them. I'll just sit here for a minute."

"Are you all…" she started to ask, then realized that watching Shego while wearing swim trunks might have left Ron in a condition where he would prefer to not stand up and move around. She stood and leaned over to look him in the eyes, although he had some trouble looking her in the eyes when brown breasts, barely contained in a white bikini top were swaying inches from his face. Monique ran her fingernails slowly and gently over his chest. "Are you all right," she asked in a tone of teasing concern.

"You're as bad as Shego," he groaned.

"You don't even be thinking about touching her," Monique warned.

"I can think about touching you?"

"You can think about it, but don't try touching yet… Of course, you could always ask me out for a movie tonight and we could make out in the dark. If you can get your problem under control."

"You're not helping," Ron groaned and crossed his hands on his lap.

She opened her eyes in mock surprise, "Really?" and swayed a little back and forth again. "You don't want to sit in a dark movie theater with me? Paying no attention to the movie while we–"

"Go tell them Shego won," he told her. "Then get a bucket of cold water to pour on me."

She laughed and gave him a kiss on the nose before announcing the winner.

Kim challenged Shego to a rematch at tennis the next week, and beat the thief by a slightly better margin that Shego had enjoyed in their first set.

Shego called Kim with a competition for the next weekend. "Rattlesnake roundup in west Texas."

"Rattlesnake roundup? Texas? I'm not sure I want to call in a ride for catching rattlesnakes."

"I'll fly us down - if you're not scared. Don't need to bring Doofus and Monique – let 'em go out alone if they want. They've got real judges for this. Which of us catches more than the other, total weight of all the snakes we catch, and which of us catches the largest snake."

"I'm still not sure I understand. Judges? Is this just you and me or something with other people?"

"Rattlesnake Days in Armpit, Texas. One of the holes in the Bible belt."

"Where did you hear about this?"

"Duh, the internet. Where else are you going to read about junk like that? Oh, they say wear a good pair of boots.

The women were handed some gunnysacks to hold the snakes they captured and at the starting gun joined over a hundred other snake wranglers. At three in the afternoon the two met towards the end of the line of those waiting to have their snakes counted and weighed.

"I'm going to beat you," Shego said confidently, holding up squirming bags of snakes.

"I doubt it," Kim countered and held up some equally lively bags.

"How'd you ladies do?" a man ahead of them in line asked. "Don't get a lot of women in the huntin', most of 'em are just cookin'."

"Cooking?" Kim asked. "Cooking what?"

He looked puzzled by the question. "Rattlesnakes, o'course. What else on Rattlesnake Days? Chop the heads off, gut 'em, and fry 'em up. Taste just like chicken."

Kim and Shego turned and looked at each other.

"I, uh, need to go to the bathroom," Shego began, "I'll–"

"Port-a-Johnnies over there behind the feed store," the man said to be helpful and pointed south. Shego left.

"I… My mom asked me to mail a letter," Kim told him. "Where's the post office?"

"'bout two blocks that way," he said, pointed. "Ought to get your snakes in first."

"No… There's such a line here and I really need to get these letters in the mail. Promised mom." Kim also left the line.

Kim and Shego saw each other about fifteen minutes later.

"So, ah, how many snakes did you catch, Princess?"

"None," Kim admitted. "You?"

"Didn't catch any either."

Kim giggled nervously. "Professional courtesy?"

"What?"

"Old joke. Why won't sharks eat lawyers? Professional courtesy."

"Ya sidewinder," Shego drawled, "yer lower than a snake's belly if'n ya think I'd–"

"I'm proud of you. And that doesn't happen often. I saw a Segar's Chicken near the landing strip. If they're not closed for Rattlesnake Days it's my treat."

As the two women settled into a booth with their two-piece dinners, red beans and rice, and biscuits with honey butter Shego commented, "Just didn't seem fair. You're living comfortably in your home under a rock, digesting the mouse you ate for breakfast, and someone pulls you out, chops off your head, guts you, dips you in beer batter and deep-fries you."

Kim nodded in agreement, "Amen."

Shego took a bite of chicken, chewed, and mumbled to Kim before swallowing, "Tastes just like rattlesnake."

Kim laughed so hard she spit out some of the red beans and rice in her own mouth. "Don't do that," Kim complained. "Wouldn't it have been something if eating rattlesnakes had really caught on?"

"Instead of cattle drives to the railhead in Abilene," Shego added, "there'd have been snake drives, with cowboys on horses–"

"Snakeboys," Kim corrected her. "Got to have snakeboys on snake drives."

"There you go," Shego agreed. "Probably the reason it didn't catch on. Who wants to be called a snakeboy? Although it probably applied to two-thirds of the guys in my high school."

"Hah! Middleton's better than your old high school. Only half the guys at Middleton are snakeboys. Would have been something to see though, snakeboys driving a herd of rattlesnakes along the trail, calling out, 'Move along little doggies…' They wouldn't call them doggies. What would they call them?"

Shego shrugged, "Who knows? They're like cats. You can call them anything, but they won't listen."

The contest the next weekend was archery. Kim won, and Shego offered to take her out for dinner. Kim was now slightly ahead of Shego in their competitions.

"This is nice," Kim commented, looking around the Japanese restaurant after the waiter had taken their order.

Shego grinned, "I win."

"You win what?"

"I took you to eat at a better place than you took me."

"I didn't know it was a competition!"

"Princess, everything between us is a competition," Shego reminded her.


	3. Sooner or Later I'm Greater Than You

Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the Kim Possible series are owned by Disney. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

A couple Fibber McGee and Molly allusions and two for Pride and Prejudice in the chapter. Apologies to Thomas Linquist and anyone else who knows the proper order of events in a triathalon for messing up the order last chapter.

**Sooner or Later I'm Greater Than You**

"Mom," Kim reported at dinner on Friday, "I asked Shego to come over tomorrow to play video games."

"Shego? Your enemy?"

"Who?" her father asked.

"Ms Go," Kim reminded him. "You thought she was with the circus."

"Is this another one of your insane competitions?" her mother asked.

"Video games aren't insane," Jim interrupted.

"Do you want some good cheats?" Tim asked his sister.

"No cheating, I'm going to beat her fair," Kim told her brothers. "But I was practicing with Ron and Felix last night."

"You are spending a lot of time with that woman," her mother pointed out. "You used to spend more time with Ron and Monique."

"They're spending a lot of time together, I feel like I'd be in the way."

"Does it bother you?" Anne asked her daughter.

"No… He seems to… I don't know, be more in date mode with her than he was when we went out."

"You'd been best friends since four," her mother reminded her. "I won't say he took you for granted, but he didn't need to impress you. He's unsure of himself with Monique so he's trying harder." She could have also told her daughter that, if she were romantically interested in Ron, she should have done more to show it – Kim also had manifested a tendency to simply treat Ron like a pal. Sometimes Anne wondered if the two had dated out of a romantic affection or because they had been close friends for so long that they slipped into dating unconsciously.

On Sunday morning Anne found Shego asleep on the living room couch with a comforter over her. _"I wonder how long she and Kim were playing video games last night. She'll probably need breakfast."_

After Shego issued her next challenge Kim asked Monique to judge the competition.

"What is it this time," Monique sighed. "And why me?"

"'Cause you're perfect. It's a shopping contest."

"Shopping contest?"

"Two of them. Right here in Middleton. Two different contests, really. Which of us can find the best outfit for ourself, while spending seventy-five dollars or less, and which of us can find the best outfit for the other, also under seventy-five dollars. We have to give you the receipts to prove we didn't overspend."

"So… You're dressing each other now?"

"We are not dressing each other. She claims she can get stuff cheaper than I can. I don't think she can. I'm going to beat her."

"Still say you're dressing each other. Have you noticed Ron is dressing better these days?"

"Yeah, I figured you deserved the credit. I could never get him out of that ratty old jersey."

"I had his mother lose it in the laundry. I see two problems. How do I judge who the winner is, and will you really wear an outfit Shego picks out for you? In public? Have you lost your mind? She's going to dress you like a whore or a clown or something."

"No she won't. Buying something trashy for the other to wear is a big lose. I hadn't thought enough about how to declare a winner… You want to decide? Ask Ron and Felix to judge? If they split their vote you decide the winner. Don't explain the rules too well to them. If they declare me the winner both times it means I won for finding an outfit for myself and Shego would win for the dressing me contest."

"Ask Wade to cast a vote. That way I don't have to do tie-breaking, I'll just check the receipts on the cheaper contest. I still say she's going to buy something to make you look bad."

"She wants to win too much… She's not so bad, really. We talk after our competitions. Under her attitude she's got a wicked sense of humor."

"Emphasis on wicked. Sense of humor as in dressing you funny?"

"Sense of humor as in she's fun to talk with… You know, there are weeks when the most fun I have is the competition with Shego and dinner with her after we're done."

"You sure the two of you aren't trying to dress each other?"

"Monique! I'm just saying I know her better… I think she'll really try to top me in getting me something nice under budget. Hey, I didn't accuse you of doing anything you shouldn't to get Ron out of his jersey, did I?"

Monique laughed, "Did I tell you about when I brought him home to meet Momma? His pants fell down. I didn't think Mom would ever let me see him again."

Monique worked at Club Banana that weekend. Kim and Shego showed up as the store opened to begin the competition. At two Kim and Shego had to be done shopping and turn their receipts into Monique. At two-thirty the guys were supposed to show up at Club Banana to serve as judges as Kim and Shego modeled their outfits.

"Okay, guys," Monique instructed Ron, Felix, and Wade, "technically Kim already won this first round. This is strictly a price round, and Kim spent less. So, unless her outfit is so tacky you don't think she'd really wear it, she wins." She didn't tell them that while Kim had picked out this outfit for herself the second round would be outfits they had picked out for each other.

After confirming Kim's win the two women went back into the fitting rooms to change while Monique gave new instructions. "This is the round you're really here for. Who's wearing an outfit that really screams who's wearing it. Does Shego's outfit say Shego more than Kim's outfit says Kim?"

"Women talk to their clothes?" Wade whispered to Ron.

"They're kind of weird," Ron answered in the same whisper. "But talking to their clothes isn't that bad, it's when they think their clothes talk to them that you know they're crazy."

"If Ron's clothes could talk," Felix added, "they'd be saying 'Wash me'."

Monique sighed, "Will you clowns try to finish your routine while I see if Kim and Shego are ready?"

Shego wore a bulky, oversized green sweater, originally priced at a hundred and fifty dollars, but last season and marked down to thirty-four ninety-five in clearance. Kim had enough money left after the black stretch pants and shoes she bought for Shego to buy a pair of black earrings as well. Kim looked very preppy in a tweed skirt and white oxford shirt, a light sweater tied around her neck, and knee-high socks with saddle shoes.

The guys whispered among themselves for a minute before Ron announced, "Kim wins."

"I'm not sure what you mean," Monique asked for clarification. "This is about the outfit. Who is wearing the outfit you think fits her best."

"Kim," Felix told her. "She's leaving in a couple months for college and that will look good. Shego's outfit just doesn't–"

"This a great outfit!" Shego protested. "Merino wool, very soft and comfortable. I love it."

"Look," Wade tried to explain, "you may like the outfit. But it isn't flattering, too casual–"

"I happen to like casual," Shego insisted. "This is great."

"Sorry," Ron told her, "but you lose this one."

"Uh, actually it means she won," Monique tried to explain.

The expression on all the guys' faces was a skeptical huh?

"Kim got the outfit for Shego, Shego bought the outfit for Kim. So if you liked Kim's outfit more it means that Shego won."

"I still don't get it," Ron admitted.

"It means if we liked Kim's outfit that Shego won the competition because she picked it out," Wade commented.

"I still happen to think this is a hell of a good outfit," Shego insisted.

"It is," Monique confirmed. "Both of you did great. What do guys know about style or fashion?"

Kim walked with the green woman out of the mall. Before Shego left Kim asked timidly, "You really liked the outfit I picked out?"

"Loved it, Pumpkin. You did great. A little warm right now, but when it gets cooler I'll be wearing this."

"And I loved what you picked out for me. Thanks." An earlier conversation with Monique flashed through Kim's mind._ "We are not dressing each other,"_ she told herself firmly. _"This was just a competition. Nothing more."_

"So, what's the competition for this weekend?" Shego asked in her mid-week call.

"No competition this weekend."

"Why not?"

"Our church is helping a Habitat for Humanity project."

"And that's more important than me? You're hurting my feelings."

"It's more important than seeing which was of us can eat more hotdogs in thirty minutes."

"Was that the competition? 'Cause frankly, Pumpkin, that just sounds gross."

"No, that would not have been the competition. I'm saying that helping rehab a house so someone can live there is more important than proving to you I'm better than you."

"No, you're not. So… What will you be doing?"

"I don't know. Probably dry wall or shingles."

"Shingles? Nail gun or hammer?"

"Hammer. Are you… I can cover more than you."

"Sure," the green woman snorted. "if you just throw them down and hammer one nail in. I happen to be damn good with shingles."

"Any chance you'd care to put your money where your mouth is?"

"You're challenging me? You really think you can beat me? Name the stakes."

"Steaks."

"Yeah, that's what I said, name the stakes."

"No. See, you're staying stakes, s-t-a-k-e-s, and I'm saying steaks, s-t-e-a-k-s."

"Oh, so I not only get to whip your ass in putting on shingles but you'll buy me a steak dinner afterward?"

"No, you'll be buying me a steak dinner."

"In your dreams, Princess. Give me an address and time."

"Eight-thirty at—"

"Wait, eight-thirty in the morning?"

"We're planning to work all day."

"I sleep late on Saturday."

"That's okay. I knew you couldn't put up more—"

"I'll be there. What was the address?"

"Seventy-nine Wistful Vista."

Shego, in black jeans and an old green sweatshirt with donut in hand and drinking coffee from a Styrofoam cup, was at the site when the Possible car arrived. "Is that Shego talking to Johnnie Hurt?" Anne whispered to her daughter.

"Yes. I wonder what he's saying to-"

"The same thing he says to every woman between sixteen and sixty. Shall I assume this is another of your insane competitions? The two of you need to grow up."

"It's not an insane competition. She's here to help Habitat. Then she's going to buy me a steak dinner."

"She's buying you a steak dinner?"

"Well, after I lay more shingles than she does."

Anne sighed. "Try not to hurt each other, or break anything. And what is she calling herself."

"I don't know."

"Well find out in case someone asks about her."

"Kim! Anne!" the church member called as the Possible women approached. "Your friend Catherine beat you here."

"Catherine?"

Shego smiled, "Kim just knows me as Kitty. I'm not sure she knew my real name, Catherine Bennett."

"So nice of you to come and help when you and Kim hardly know each other," Anne said coldly.

"What can I say," Shego shrugged, "I'm just a generous warm-hearted person. Especially after Kim promised me a steak dinner if I showed up."

"I was asking her—" he began.

"Not the way I heard it, Johnnie," Kim told him. "She's buying me dinner."

"I'd be willing to take two beautiful women out for dinner—"

"Drywall, Johnnie," Anne told him firmly. "Kim, you said you and your 'friend' are working on shingles?"

"Yes, Mom."

"The two of you be careful. I wouldn't want anyone 'falling' off the roof. Mrs. Jordan and I will be putting up wall paper in the bathroom if you need me."

"Is Catherine your real name," Kim whispered as the man reluctantly left to work on drywall.

"What do you think?"

"I don't think you'd tell the truth under torture."

"Got that right. So your whole church full of leches?"

"He's not a lech, he's just lonely. Very lonely. Very, very lonely."

"I'll say. How are we doing this? There are two dormers on the front. That means more shingles on the front. But if we do those first, there'll be less roof on the front."

"I hadn't thought of… Same number of shingles in a bundle, right?"

"Good idea, just keep track of… Those dormers are still going to take some extra care."

"We'll do them first. We keep track when we start on the main roof. We'll flip a coin for who takes the front, but I assume whoever has that will finish first. We count who's used the most shingles at that point and you owe me dinner after we finish the back."

"In your dreams, Princess."

The dormers went smoothly. Shego peeled off the sweatshirt to reveal a black t-shirt as the competition grew serious. They flipped a quarter and Kim was assigned the roof of the front of the house. At noon someone called, "Kim! Catherine! Lunch. Get a sandwich."

"Going to keep working," 'Catherine' called. "Not hungry."

"Got to make sure we finish today," Kim answered.

At three o'seven Kim called, "Finished the front." Shego was ahead by eleven shingles. "Going around the dormers slowed me down," Kim grumbled. "I had to do more cutting and fitting. That's why you won."

"Tough luck, Princess. At least you admit I won. Going to finish the back here with me?"

Kim shrugged, "Sure."

Shego felt slightly guilty for having hidden five shingles and counted them in her total. She would have won even with an honest count.

Reverend Collins greeted them when they came down from the roof. "Thanks for coming out to help," he told Shego. "Forgive me for not shaking hands, I've been working on getting the sewer line clear. I hear you two did a great job." He looked at Shego, "I heard your name was Catherine?" Shego nodded her head. "Kim will be leaving for college soon, but if you want to come by and help next time our church has a Habitat Home you'd certainly be welcome."

At the end of the day James Possible was putting bandaids on his blistered hands and Anne's shirt was stiff in a few spots from wallpaper paste. "I have to take Shego out for dinner," Kim explained when her mother called her to get in the car.

"She can come with us," Anne invited. "Eating out makes sense, I don't have anything at home."

"I… uh… don't know," Shego stammered. "I… um… didn't–"

"You'll eat with us," Anne told her firmly. "I like to know my daughter's friends. And as much time as the two of you spend together you're Kim's friend."

"Mom! We're not friends!" Kim blushed.

"Competitors!" Shego insisted. "We're competitors."

"Then James and I like to know our daughter's competition. There's a new Thai place on–"

"I promised her steak," Kim interrupted. "You and dad go to the Thai place. Shego and I will–"

"Will come with us for steak. We don't have reservations for Thai. Will the House of Dead Cow do or were you planning to take her somewhere fancier?"

"Mom!" Kim protested.

"I'm really not dressed for–"

"If you're well enough dressed to eat out with our daughter you're well enough dressed to eat out with her parents. Car. Now."

Wednesday Kim called Shego to apologize for having to eat with the family the previous weekend and set up the next competition.

"Your Mom is used to getting her way, isn't she?" Shego commented.

"Yeah. Pretty much."

"You've got the same problem. So, what's your idea?"

"Ice skating."

"Ice skating? Earth to Kim, it's summertime."

"There is a big rink in Allis. Olympic skaters practice there, but they have open hours. I'll be a nice break for the heat, I'll bet it was over a hundred on that roof last weekend."

The two were not able to go ice skating the next weekend. Kim and Ron were called for a rescue mission on Friday afternoon.

"Bless you for saving our village," the headman told the pair.

"It was nothing," Kim answered modestly. "Anyone could have rolled those boulders into place and diverted the lava flow."

"But you were the ones who did it. Please, spend the weekend here and let us thank you properly with island hospitality."

"I really need to get back to Middleton," Kim told him.

"We will give a massive feast in your honor," he promised.

"I don't want a massive feast... I mean, thank you very much for the offer but-"

"He said massive feast," Ron whispered to Kim. "Massive. We shouldn't hurt their feelings."

"I don't-" Kim began

"The two of you may invite guests," the headman offered. "We owe you our homes for what you've done."

"Monique would love a weekend in a tropical paradise," Ron argued. "Please? You can ask someone."

"Fine," Kim sighed. "You and Monique deserve a weekend in paradise."

After the village elder left to start preparations for the feast Ron asked, "So, who you going to ask? Felix? Your family?"

"I hadn't thought about it. I just agreed 'cause you want a weekend on the beach with Monique. I don't think the island is handicapped accessible, and I'm not letting Tim and Jim ruin my weekend."

"You could ask Wade."

"To leave his computers? I don't think they've got Wi-fi here."

"Any guy you've got your eye on? Nothing says romance like a weekend on a tropical beach."

Kim blushed, "I do not have my eye on any guy. And I'm not going to ask some guy I hardly know out for a romantic weekend."

"You should, you've been spending way too much time with Shego."

"Shego..."

"No, KP, quiet restful weekend. Island beaches, massive feast."

"There has got to be some kind of competition... Surfing."

"Are you listening? And you aren't a great surfer."

"I don't have to be a great surfer. I just have to be better than her."

"You're supposed to be having fun!"

"I have fun competing with Shego. Besides, how is Monique going to get here?" Ron opened his mouth, then shut it. He hadn't considered that question. "See," Kim continued, "if you want Monique out here the best way would be to have Shego fly her."

"I want to spend a weekend with Monique, not judging one of your contests with Shego."

"Fine. You don't have to judge any contest. But if you want Monique I need to give Shego a call."

"But no judging?"

"No judging, I promise. Hey, and you don't judge me for asking Shego, okay?"

"Got it, KP. Hey, if she can fly Monique out I'll never say a bad thing about her again, ever."

"Never?"

"Well, this weekend. I promise."

Surfing did not work as a competition. Unsure of the criteria used in serious surfing competition Kim and Shego decided that whoever suffered the most wipeouts would be declared the loser. Kim wiped out on her first wave and Shego stood her board in the sand and declared she would sun for the afternoon and be declared the winner by default. Grumbling, Kim agreed to let Shego score a win, if she'd just get back in the water. The two women gave Ron and Monique lessons as well. Ron did surprisingly well but Monique quit early, convinced she had seen a shark in the water.

The feast was as magnificent as promised and continued until dark. Under a full moon the four Americans went down to the beach after eating and Ron and Monique walked off along the beach, hand-in-hand, waves lapping at their feet, as Shego and Kim sat under a palm tree to talk and let their meals digest.

"You know, Princess, when I saw Monique in that bikini that day on the beach I figured I knew the two reasons Ron was interested, but she's smart. I had a nice talk with her on the way out here."

"I know she's smart. And Ron is smarter than you give him credit for."

"If he can tie his own shoelaces he's smarter than I give him credit for. Want to know what was weird about talking with Monique?"

"There's nothing weird about Monique."

"She was asking me questions about you. What I thought about you and shit like that. I mean, she knows you a hell of a lot better than I do, but she was asking me about you."

"My mom asks me about you."

"At least your mom doesn't know me. Monique knows you."

"I don't think anyone knows you. I don't even know your real name. What is your real name?"

"Drakken doesn't even know my real name."

"I didn't ask if Drakken knew your real name. I asked you to tell me."

"I'm not giving my last name, would make it easier to trace me."

"I could get that from your brother, remember?"

"He'd protect his secret identity."

"It's on his name badge at the Bueno Nacho. What's your first name - your real first name?"

Shego looked out at the moonlight reflecting on the waves washing up on the shore and sighed. "Haven't used it in a long time... Alexandra."

"No Sheila, or Sharon or anything like that?"

"Nope. My nickname was Xandy."

"Sandy?"

"Yeah, pronounced like that, but spelled with an X."

"Xandy? When your name was Alexandra? That... Yeah, guess I can see it. Is that where Sandy comes from?"

"Yeah."

"Why the X?"

"I wanted to be special. I wanted people to notice me. I wanted to be exotic."

"You managed to be all that."

"Turns out it wasn't as much fun as I thought... Got to agree with Kermit. It's not easy being green. Hard to find anyone willing to look past me being a freak and ask what I really like."

"What do you like? Really? The other day when my mom asked about you I realized I hardly know anything. I'll bet you know more about me than I know about you."

Shego chuckled, "Is that the contest this weekend? Who can share the more intimate details of her life?"

"Not a contest. I don't want all the intimate details. But I'd like to know you better. You said people saw you as a freak and didn't ask what you really liked. I don't see you as a freak. I'm asking what you really like."

"You don't see me as a freak? I throw freaking balls of green plasma at you, can bench press over twice my weight, and I'm green, and you don't see me as a freak?"

"No. What do you like? Let's start easy. Favorite TV show? I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours."

"You're serious?"

"I'm serious. I used to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

"Buffy? You watched Buffy?"

"Yes I did. Now, tell me your favorite show."

The conversation continued for hours. After the heat of the day the breeze coming off the ocean seemed cool. Rather than going back to their beds Kim moved in front of Shego and had the older woman put her arms around her. Kim woke up on the beach in the morning, still in Shego's arms. The redhead wondered what her mother would say about Shego confessing her real name. _"Better not tell her. Shego trusted me, it's her secret."_ Kim ruled out teasing the older woman about her name as well, at least any time in the near future. Kim smiled, it felt wonderful that the older woman had trusted her.

Shego agreed to not count the island weekend as an 'official' weekend for Kim, and the next weekend they went to the ice rink. As they paid for admission on Saturday the woman in the ticket office explained, "The outer lane is for those practicing speed skating. The inner lanes are recreational, and you should be able to tell that the hockey rinks are for hockey. If you hear the siren it means the Zamboni is coming out. Move to the seating area at the center or off the rink until it's finished."

"I'm a little out of shape on ice skates," Shego confessed as she laced up. "How about we just skate around awhile until we're ready to race?"

"Sounds good. And we don't have any judge for style competition."

Kim smiled as Shego pulled on the heavy green sweater Kim had purchased for her at the shopping competition.

It didn't take long for Shego to regain her confidence, or perhaps overconfidence. She was skating backwards, just in front of Kim, when Kim noticed a child fall on the ice twenty meters ahead of her. Shego, who could not see the little girl, looked like she would collide with the youngster so Kim grabbed her hands and pulled the woman to one side, causing the two of them to twirl slightly on the ice and miss the child. "What the–" Shego began, then noticed the four year old. "Good move."

"Thanks," Kim smiled. She released one of Shego's hands, but without even thinking continued to hold the other hand. Nor did Shego object, instead the pale woman intertwined her fingers with Kim's. Neither said a word as they continued to glide around the track until the siren and flashing red light announced the Zamboni.

"We could sit on the stands and watch the hockey game until the ice is resurfaced," Kim suggested.

"Sounds good. You find a place for us, I'll buy a couple cups of hot chocolate."

Kim took a sip of the hot liquid as they watched middle school students play hockey. "I swear, those kids must have been born wearing ice skates."

"Probably real uncomfortable for their mothers… So, Pumpkin, what happens when you go to college? Going to keep up the crime fighting?"

Kim shrugged. "Mom wants me to give it up for freshman year and settle in to college life. She says I can't save the world unless it's an emergency or something. Drakken have any big schemes in the works?"

"Nah. He owes Jack Hench a bundle for all the labs you and Ron blew up, he–"

"Ron and I do no blow up labs! The explosives are all his."

"Whatever. He's doing quality control in Hench Labs to pay off the debt. Drakken doing quality control? The world should be safe for awhile."

"What are you doing?"

"Don't really know. Probably taking it easy for a few months. I–"

"You could come out and visit me."

"What?"

Kim blushed, afraid she had sounded too eager, "I mean, some kind of competition or something… If you want… I mean; I'll probably have time to… Never mind…"

"No, sounds good. I like… I like the competition. You're almost as good as I am."

Kim chuckled, "So how good are…" She blushed. The conversation was getting out of hand. "We… I need to go now."

Kim spent Monday moping in her room. "What's wrong?" her mother asked.

"I don't know."

"Are you coming down with something?"

"I don't think so."

"Worried about going off to college?"

"Yeah… That's probably it. Were you kind of all mixed up before you went to college – all excited, and scared, and happy, and sad all at once?"

Anne laughed, "Oh, I've felt like that several times in my life. We moved when I was ten years old. I think that was the first time. My first boyfriend in middle school… Second boyfriend too. Going to college. When I met your father. The night before they announced board certification. When I found out I was pregnant with you. Big changes in your life – or thinking there may be big changes in your life – can bring the feeling on. Are you sure college is what's troubling you?"

"What else could it be?"

"I don't know. Just asking."

Tuesday Shego called for the next competition. "Wally World?" Kim asked, puzzled. "What kind of a competition is an amusement park?"

"We'll find something, Princess. C'mon, it'll be fun. Have you heard about their new Killer Koaster?"

"Is that the one where the crash test dummies they used on the practice runs kept coming back with missing heads, arms, and legs?"

"That's the one. They don't run it full speed with people on it – and they make you sign a waiver of limited liability before you can get on."

"Why does that not sound like fun?"

"You chicken?"

"Hey, Drakken's death traps didn't scare me – and they were supposed to kill me. But I wouldn't go on a death trap ride just for the thrill of it."

"You'll scream like Ron."

"Fine. I'll go on the ride with you. But you have to stop making fun of Ron."

They talked for two and a half hours until Kim's cell phone battery died.

They arrived early at the amusement park. They were both laughing as they got off the Killer Koaster.

"Flying out here with you was scarier than that," Kim told Shego.

"You making fun of my flying?"

Kim ignored the question, "I saw bumper cars. I love bumper cars. I can hit you more than you hit me."

"You're on, Princess."

The manager ejected Shego from the bumper cars pavilion. Kim found her waiting at the exit when her time was finished.

"I thought the whole point was hitting people," the green woman complained.

"You have to play by the rules. No headons. And go with the flow of traffic instead of against it."

They ate cotton candy and hot dogs for lunch and rode the Tilt-a-whirl until Kim felt sick to her stomach. They rode the Ferris-wheel until Kim felt better, enjoying a cool breeze and view of the park that was impossible on the ground.

At the arcade Kim beat Shego at ski ball. "It's a game of luck," Shego complained. "I can beat you in games of skill. Let's hit the midway."

"Three balls for a dollar," the barker at one of the concessions called out. "Knock down all three cans on each target and win a bear."

"I'm getting you the pink bear," Kim told Shego and pointed to a large stuffed bear on the top shelf.

"No you won't," Shego warned her, "it's a cheat. And I don't want a pink bear, it would clash with my skin color."

"It's skill, and I can do it," Kim insisted. "You are so getting the pink bear."

Kim put a dollar down on the counter and was handed three balls. Shego noted they were wrapped in electrical tape to hide the fact they had been cut in two with a weight replacing the core on one side to keep them from throwing straight. Shego counted two other methods designed to keep anyone from winning the top prizes

Kim was given a rainbow pencil as a consolation prize. "This time for sure," she told Shego and put another dollar on the counter. At the end of eight dollars Kim had five rainbow pencils, a rubber duck and a toothbrush holder from the level one shelf, and a set of fuzzy dice to hang from the rearview mirror from the second shelf.

"Give up," Shego urged. "You're not winning the bear."

"I am going to get that bear," Kim insisted. "Give me a dollar."

"No."

"C'mon, this time for sure."

"No, Pumpkin. Now is the time for serious intervention. You need the bear off your back." Shego looked at the barker running the booth, "Give me three balls," she said, handing him a dollar.

Two minutes later Shego smiled sweetly, "I think that means I get any prize on the top shelf?"

"How the hell did you do that? You cheated. What was that green fire stuff?"

"Green fire stuff? No idea what you're talking about."

"You cheated!"

"Want me to call security over to look at your setup?" Shego bluffed. "I know Wally World expects you to make a profit, but that electromagnet you've got—"

"Top shelf," he sighed. "Whatta ya want?"

"Thanks," Kim said, hugging the bear as they walked around the park.

The rainbow pencils were handed out to passing children, as was the toothbrush holder. Kim gave Shego the rubber duck for her bathtub and the fuzzy dice to hang in her plane.

"I spent more on you than you spent on me," Kim pointed out as they headed for the exit.

Shego opened her mouth to point out that Kim had gotten the better prize, but she looked over at the red-haired woman beside her, laughing and hugging the pink bear, and suddenly felt like spending the day with Kim had been the best prize. "Yes you did, Pumpkin," Shego agreed. "You win on that."

"Of course, it was your idea, and you flew us here, and you did better at knocking down the cans. But I beat you at ski ball and… I think I beat you somewhere else. Can we call it even for the day?"

"Sounds fair to me… Of course I think the fuzzy dice put me ahead, but I'll call it even."

Kim hoped her Pandaroo™ wasn't jealous about spending the night on the chair while the stuffed bear took its place on the bed.

Shego called Sunday, worried that Kim might have gotten sunburned at the park.

On Monday Kim found an excuse to call Shego, but really just chatted.

Tuesday Shego asked about the next competition. "I'm working on it," Kim promised. "I haven't picked out where yet, but I know what we're going to do."

"Well, what are we going to do?" Shego demanded.

"Call tomorrow," Kim giggled, "I'll tell you then."

"It's your turn to call me tomorrow."

"Um… Well, I'll call tomorrow, but you have to ask."

"I'm asking now."

"Patience is a virtue."

"If you haven't noticed, I'm not very good with virtue."

"I noticed. I'm trying to decide if it's one of the things I like about you."

Wednesday Kim told Shego they would be dancing, she hadn't found a good place yet. "Unless," Kim said nervously, "you don't want to dance with me."

"No, I… I'm not used to dancing as competition, just for fun. Are we supposed to get judges like that Dancing with the Stars or something?"

"I hadn't really figured that out… Why don't we just dance and decide at the end of the night?"

Saturday morning Kim called to ask Shego to pick her up that evening.

"I don't have to come into the house and meet your parents or anything, do I?" the green woman asked suspiciously.

"No, mom and dad are at a scientific conference and my car is in the shop," Kim explained. The car in the shop was true. Her mom and dad were actually out at a square dancing competition, but it would have required torture for Kim to admit that to anyone.

The club was dark, which encouraged a sense of anonymity. And the dance floor was crowded which forced Kim and Shego close together. Neither seemed to mind the proximity. The volume of the music was loud enough to discourage any unnecessary conversation and the air conditioner, running full blast to counteract the summer heat and the warm bodies on the dance floor, produced gusts of cold air. The two women were grateful for the slow numbers, where they could stand with their arms around each other, swaying to the music.

"Well, this didn't work for competition did it," Kim whispered in Shego's ear.

"No," Shego agreed. "Not every idea works out… I don't mind."

"It's fun," the younger woman agreed. "except you always want to lead."

"Me? You're the one always trying to lead. I bet you made Ron follow."

"Not sure I ever danced with Ron like this. But you're having fun?" Shego said nothing, simply holding Kim a little tighter. Kim laid her head on Shego's shoulder and sighed. "Me too."

They left before midnight. "Promised I'd be home," Kim told a disappointed Shego.

"Aren't they out somewhere?"

"Yes, but they will come home."

"Just a little longer? We're both having fun."

"I want to, but I can't."

"I could refuse to give you a ride."

"I could call a taxi."

"We can go," Shego grumbled.

Shego insisted on walking Kim to the front door. "Think your parents are home?"

"I doubt it." Kim unlocked the door, but didn't open it. There was a minute of tense silence, each waiting for the other to say something. "I… uh… guess I need to go in," Kim began and started to turn.

Shego gathered her courage, afraid of the consequences, but not willing to remain in ignorance. Her hand shot out, catching Kim's wrist and jerking the younger woman towards her. "I kiss better than you."

"No you—" Kim started to protest before Shego's lips met her own.

The kiss lasted only a second before Kim pushed the older woman away with a sharp, "No!" Shego was ready to apologize, but instead of the rebuke Kim warned. "You can't start a competition without warning me. I can kiss better than you." Kim put her arms around Shego and pulled the other woman close to prove her point.

When the first competition proved inconclusive Shego suggested, "We should try again."

"Still not sure," Kim admitted after the second round. "Best fifty out of ninety-nine or keep going until we've got a clear winner."

"I think we've got two winners now," Shego smiled, and pulled Kim close for another kiss.

They moved inside for the next phase of the competition.

Kim's parents returned home more than an hour later. Her mother heard noise coming from her daughter's room as she entered the house. "Kim, are you all right?" Anne called.

There was no response.

"Kim!" Anne called louder. "Are you okay?"

The noise ended suddenly. "Fine," Kim called quickly. "No problem."

"I thought I heard something."

"Uh, moving furniture. No problem."

"Moving furniture? After one in the morning?"

"Just... Sorry… Wasn't thinking."

"Can I see what you've done?"

"NO! I… It didn't work… I was just putting things back where they were."

"Well your father and I are home and we're going to bed. Please stop moving furniture."

Kim looked over at the dark-haired woman beside her in bed. "You heard Mom, quiet now," she whispered.

Shego smiled, and kept her own voice to a whisper, "Moving furniture? Interesting euphemism. I was hoping you felt the earth move."

"That too," Kim agreed, and pulled the older woman close for another kiss.

"Moving furniture?" James repeated to his wife, "at this hour? She's leaving soon, why is she moving furniture?"

"She told me she was feeling very stressed a couple weeks ago. Maybe she thought physical exercise would help her sleep."

"I could make her a glass of warm milk."

"Don't. She just needs to rest."

"But a glass of warm milk–"

"No! Go to bed. We're all tired." Anne sighed to herself as she and James went to their bedroom_, "I wonder if Shego will want breakfast in the morning or try to sneak out of the house without anyone seeing her?"_ She liked the idea of honesty, but didn't want to explain things to her husband. Perhaps this was just some experiment on Kim's part, or maybe it was just some insane competition between her daughter and the older woman. _"I don't know what I'd say to her or Kim. I'm glad Kim is leaving for college soon. She needs some distance from that woman."_

"I definitely felt the earth move," Shego told Kim when her lips were again available for talking. "Little surprised about you not being honest with your parents."

"I'll be honest with them, just not tonight."

"I'd like to see that."

"I'm planning on you being there."

"I don't know about that."

"You will be there," Kim whispered emphatically, "and we do it before volleyball next weekend."

Shego looked disappointed, "I know we're competitive, but I was kind of hoping we–"

Kim put her hand over the green woman's lips to silence her. "We'll be a team. You and me together? Nothing can stop us."

-The End-


End file.
